This involves deeply listening to and understanding the other person’s perspective.Įmpathic listening requires more than just listening with your ears! You must focus on other non-verbal cues, such as body language and tone of voice. In order to have meaningful conversation, we need to develop empathic listening. Covey says that most people “ listen with the intent to reply rather than understand”. The fifth habit of highly effective people relates to how we communicate and listen to others. Covey, 7 Habits of Highly Effective People Most people do not listen with the intent to understand they listen with the intent to reply. Seek first to understand, then to be understood Instead, try to emulate aspects of what they are doing. Remember that there is plenty to go around! Do not be envious of other people because of their success. there is plenty for everyone and just because you benefit doesn’t mean I will lose out). In order to have a win-win mindset we must maintain an abundance mentality (i.e. A particularly toxic result of having this mindset is that we begin to think in terms of winning only when someone else loses.Ī win-win mindset sees the world as being cooperative rather than competitive. Ī lot of people compare ourselves to other people, and then base our self worth on those comparisons. The matrix is divided into four quadrants –, , and.
STEPHEN COVEY 7 HABITS SUMMARY HOW TO
In other words, how to manage ourselves effectively. For example, I’ve seen many people working in offices who drop everything they are doing when a new email arrives in their inbox, even though it may not be the most urgent or important thing they should be focusing on.Ĭovey uses a time management matrix to help focus on the most important tasks at the right time. Busying ourselves with a long list of tasks, always jumping to do the first thing that comes along. It is easy to get caught up in ‘busy work’. If we do not have clear and defined principles by which to live our lives, it is likely that we will be swept along by other people or circumstances by default. Your Personal Mission Statement helps identify what is important to you and whether you are actually taking the steps necessary to arrive at that destination in life. Covey calls this your “Personal Mission Statement”.
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In order to ensure you are on the right path in life, you need to create a clear vision of who you want to become and how you want to live your life. We might be working hard, striving for promotions and other accolades, but how often to we check in to evaluate if what we are doing aligns with what we actually want to achieve. It’s easy to become lost in the busyness of day to day life or what Covey calls the “activity trap”. If your ladder is not leaning up against the right wall, every step you take just ends up taking you to the wrong place faster Stephen R. In short, by being proactive you can take responsibility for your life! 2. Focus your effort on improving those things. However, in order to be proactive, you need to identify what you can control or exert influence over. It’s true that some things happen which are outside of our control. If you’re reactive, you might feel at times that life is just pulling you along in a direction that you don’t particularly want to go!
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People who are mainly reactive will complain about things that are outside their control. They take steps to improve their lives in the areas that they can control or exert influence over. This first habit of highly effective people relates to how we choose to react to situations or other people.Įffective people do not just sit back and let things happen to them. “If I really want to improve my situation, I can work on the one thing over which I have control – myself.” Stephen R.
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Effective management requires “putting first things first.” Part of the effective management of the second creation is discipline.
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Our independent will is built upon our integrity and the value we perceive ourselves to have. In addition to self-awareness, imagination and conscience, independent will is what ensures that your Circle of Influence is successful. Of course, Habit 3 is not possible without laying the groundwork in Habits 1 and 2. Habit 3 is the second creation or the fulfillment of your mental creation. Habit 2 is one’s first mental creation which is the result of the power of one’s imagination and the ability to see one’s potential and uniqueness. Habit 1 teaches that you are the creator and are in charge.